Build Your Life & Legacy!

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everybody welcome back to the y ‘all are crazy ranch podcast we are excited today because we’re gonna be talking about something that’s so important to us and it’s about building the life and legacy that you want yeah and I think what stuff we’re gonna share today is gonna not saying build the life we’ve built build the life you want everybody wants a different life everybody has different goals and priorities and things they like but a lot of people don’t build the life that they want intentionally and intentionality is the key

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You know, like you said, not everybody wants what we want and what we’ve built, and that’s great because we don’t need a bunch of people like us in the world. Everybody wants different things. I know sometimes for us, people are like, well, I’d like to have what you guys have had, but when they see what it’s taken to get here, they’re not willing to do that. So, if you want something different, you’ll build your life differently. We’ve been very, I would say, obsessed lately about legacy because once you get almost 40, like we are, we’re both about to turn 39, you start realizing how short life is.

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Yeah, we’re not 40 yet.

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Not yet, but we’re approaching. So, it’s like you realize how short life is and then it makes you think about, like, what am I creating? What am I leaving behind? What am I doing that matters? What kind of legacy am I leaving? So, we’ve just been really intentional, I think, about that lately.

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Yeah, and those are like deep questions and You know, I’ll ask I’ll ask people every once in a while those kind of questions and it always shocks me now People have never thought about it. You know what I mean? They’re like, huh, man, I don’t know I even thought about that, you know, I’ll ask him a question. What do you think? It’s gonna How many grandkids do you hope you have one day? Well, I don’t know I’ve never thought about that, you know, and it’s like oh man, you know Like we’re we hope we have a whole bunch and we hope we get to do this and do this and do this and You know and we’re already talking to our kids about that.

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Yeah, you know, they’re like, okay, and obviously they’re gonna change their minds things Circumstances change but I do think it’s important to be intentional and have the conversations.

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Yes

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Yeah, and I think you got to put a lot of thought into the life that you want and design the life that you want to live And sometimes we can get caught up and say that well, I don’t really have a choice You know, I got to do this.

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I got to go to work I got a this and it’s like man you have more choice in the design of your life than you think you do You know, oh, yeah for sure You do and I think especially as Americans like we have so much Potential for growth and so many opportunities But it doesn’t take away from the fact that you have to work hard to get there. You have to live your life intentionally

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You can’t just let life pass you by and then say well now I want to do this because it might be too late to Get where you want to go.

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Yeah, you know I was listening there’s this podcast and I It’s a Brian Bafini podcast, but it’s a he he plays a recording of Earl Nightingale which was from the 1950s and Earl had recorded it for his sales team and it went on a record And you know vinyl record and it went like gold or platinum or whatever it is It sold like over a million copies in a pretty short period of time back in the 50s Yes, which is pretty wild because you you don’t just you didn’t have the internet you download it on Spotify or whatever You had to go buy a physical you couldn’t order online to have a record shipped to your house You had to go buy it and have a record player to play it. And so but he talked a lot about You

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There’s one clip where he said that this people surveyed this many men and asked them Why do you get up and go to work in the morning and almost none of them could answer the question?

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Wow, I haven’t heard this.

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He’s like, I don’t know. We just get it because that’s what we’re supposed to do You know and the point he was trying to make was there was no thought behind going to work There’s no intentionality. There’s no design of your life You just go into work because that’s what you’re supposed to do and then you’re just living but there’s no plan There’s no intentionality. Why are you at this job? You know, what are you? What do you want to work towards? Do you want to work this job forever? Or do you want to use this one to get to this one? or in any way the survey had showed that just People didn’t really have a plan. They just they just went to work

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It’s interesting. It is interesting. And I think when you know why you do something, it’s obviously gonna make you think through Okay, why am I doing this? What can I do differently? I just think so much of life is about Intentionality and teaching your kids to be intentional about what they do.

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I’ve shared before like With our kids I tell them you are where you are So you might as well be happy where you are because you can’t change where you are If you are a kid, you’re gonna go to school every day.

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So let’s make the best of that opportunity of going to school I’m I I like our kids to like be put together each day. I don’t like them I do not allow pajama pants unless it’s pajama day I don’t allow crocs at school church and some might say like that’s harsh, but I think when you dress

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put together and I’m not saying our kids wear like suits every day but I try to make sure they’re put together and I think as a as an adult when you start your day and you’re put together you’re gonna be more productive that day if you’re a mom and maybe you are staying home that day and doing laundry and doing stuff around the house taking care of kids I still think if you at least put yourself together that day you’re gonna be more productive at home. It’s kind of crazy how that works but if you you know why you’re doing it and then you have a good outlook on it and you have a plan for the day your productivity is gonna soar.

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You know it could just let Benaiah design what everybody wears for the day.

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It would be a win, you know It would as the kids would say it would be fire Be if I have a funny Benaiah story So last night was homecoming here and in our town at school and Barlow was chosen to be the crown bearer He’s in kindergarten. So he wore his wrestling singlet It was wrestling homecoming and he wanted to wear a lot of his medals that he’d won So we grabbed him off his red metal rack and he’s like, okay, I’m gonna wear these he puts them on he wears them Benaiah sees him up there and he said you did not win those two medals. He had like eight on yeah He’s like you didn’t win those two

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Barlos like what do you mean? They were on my what medal rack? He’s like no you got second and fourth in that tournament Yeah, I got third and this and this tournament and he knows exactly what place Every single one of them got at every tournament and he knew those medals weren’t Barlos Yeah, so he took him back from him. He put him on he said you did not earn those medals It’s so Benaiah were the two medals that were his the rest of the night So there would be no confusion because you know, Barlo can’t wear those if he didn’t earn them in his mind And that’s true, but I is not wrong, you know I said, did you take those back from Barlo? He said yes.

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He didn’t earn them But I is just so funny very logical, uh -huh. Yeah

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Yeah, and the wrestling tournament last weekend Benaiah was in this match and and Benaiah is on a on a good path of Getting better every weekend, but he’s still not like, you know winning first place at tournaments or nothing like that yet But and he’s at the bottom of his age bracket, you know, what is he wrestling 8u and he’s 7 Yeah, and he he’s in the open league, but he really should be a novice But he did wrestle some tournaments and so he can’t be a novice So he’s had to take a lot of losses this year, but he’s learning a bunch.

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He’s grown a lot.

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He’s got he’s gotten so much better I told him he is most improved of the year He is and he had this match last weekend and he was losing like 10 to 5 like he was getting beat You know the kid other kid was

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Was not kind of dominating them, but then but I ended up just taking him down and pinning it They got the win, you know, and then he went up to you and said what he say He said I was I was going for the tech fall, but he said it was too big So I had to pin him.

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He said he said I looked at the Score and it was ten to five so I couldn’t get the tech fall.

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So I just had to pin him Yeah It’s like and for those that don’t know it’s a tech fall means you got to get ahead of the other guy by 15 points at least at 15 points and then it’s a tech fall. Well, he was losing ten to five I mean he had had to he’d had to get up to what 25 points to tech fall Yeah, which you get three points for a takedown, you know four points I mean, it’s like I wasn’t gonna have him but the fact that that’s what he was thinking That’s all I could do and it’s like well, okay You won the match, you know, so anyway he’s funny, but

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You know, to get back on track on, on, um, you know, designing the life you want. Like one of the things I would recommend you do if you’re married to do this with your spouse or you both do it yourself and then come together and discuss it. But I would encourage you to get a piece of paper or a journal.

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I would encourage you to get a journal, but get something that you can write with and write on and just write the question, you know, what, what do I want my life to be like, and then think about it and then just start writing. Right. And there’s a lot of science behind this. Yeah. Um, if you’re like me, you’ll look at that question and stare at it until you, the actual answer comes and you’ll sit there forever and not come up with nothing, but what I’ve learned is like, you just have to start writing it out.

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a lot of times those first five or six things you write of what you want your life to be like might not really be true. You know you might get done and go that’s kind of dumb I don’t really want that. But by the time you get to seven or eight it’s like you’re writing some gold down you know. And so I would encourage you to write out how you want to design your life and then get with your spouse and share with each other then maybe even do the exercise together. You have to be and part of that is designing the life you want.

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That reminded me when you were talking about it was on a Brian Bafini episode and he was interviewing Lou Holtz the football coach from Notre Dame.

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Yeah that’s where he spent a lot of his time.

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Yeah and so he was talking he was talking about how his wife got sick and he wanted to give her something to look forward to and he started writing down all the things that they still wanted to do in life.

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and he wrote down like a hundred things and they seemed very outlandish and like this is just kind of crazy things honestly, some of it. And I think part of, yeah. And so, but he’s like, once we started writing all those down, wrote like a hundred things, he’s like, at this point, I think they had hit every one of them. Yeah. And it was like, there’s a lot of power in writing things down, dreaming together, maybe dreaming a little bit of crazy things that might not make sense to most people. And maybe you don’t hit all those. And I think that’s okay too.

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A hundred percent it’s okay. You know, cause at least you hit most of them, like you’re gonna be a lot further ahead than where you started.

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You know, the same thing on that Earl Nightingale podcast, the podcast title is called The Strangest Secret. And man, you guys gotta go listen to it. It’s so good. But he talks about if you don’t have a plan in life, right?

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He’s like, if you have a captain at the helm of a ship and you set out for sale on the harbor with no plan, he’s like, you know, no rudder, no plan. He’s like, the chances are that ship will never make it out of the harbor, right? But if you’ve got a plan and a map of where you’re going and you get on track, chances are you’re gonna end up where you’re going. You know, and designing the life you want takes a lot of intentionality, but you’ll be surprised at how powerful it can be if you just stop long enough to ask yourself the question and realize.

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what you truly want.

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That’s very true. I heard a good illustration this week and I haven’t told you this yet. So you know how God told Noah to build the ark. And he gave him like exact specifications which when you’re reading it kind of gets a little boring because it’s like why do I care about all these things and length and width. I mean it was very detailed. But it said you’ll notice that God never told him to put a steering wheel in the boat. Oh yeah. God said perhaps the scariest thing about Noah’s ark was not that there was a devastating flood that covered the earth. Or that you know they were trapped in there for 40 days while it rained and longer until it receded enough for them to get out. But the scariest part perhaps is that they had zero control.

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They didn’t even have a steering wheel to guide them from hitting rocks and, you know, actually maybe going where they thought it needed to go. They just had to trust God.

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Man, I never even thought about that.

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I thought that was super powerful.

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Yeah, you’re just floating.

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You’re just floating and saying, God, you told us to build this. And you’re going to take care of us. And I think that’s a really big deal as we talk about this, because the Bible says, like, a man makes his plans, but the Lord directs his steps.

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Yes.

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Now, I do think it’s important for us to make plans.

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Yeah, you have to.

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We have to make plans. And I think God wants us to live a life of intentionality. You look at people in the Bible that God used mightily and blessed mightily. King David.

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Daniel, Moses, like, they had plans and really big callings on their life. They didn’t just walk around aimlessly, however, like, God directed their steps. We don’t know necessarily what next week’s gonna hold, but we know God’s with us and He’s gonna carry us through and He’s gonna be our help and our comforter. And I think when we know He’s with us and He is directing the ship, okay, it’s like that Jesus take the wheel song. Yeah, He’s got the wheel. However, like we know I had to build the Oklahoma Grassfed Beef Ark. He didn’t God just didn’t say I’m just gonna whisk you away and keep you in a little umbrella safe like no, I had to I have read that Noah spent 100 years building the Ark longer back then obviously.

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I think take a long time to build that thing by hand by I mean It was a long time ago and they didn’t they have no D wall to like we had helpers But you know, he got made fun of the Bible tells us that he got made fun of he you know people laughed at him I don’t even know at that point. There obviously never been a flood like that But had there even been like much rain Did they even know what this was and did they have any need for a boat at this time?

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So God Provided for Noah and kept his family safe, but Noah had to actually intentionally build the ark Yeah, he did and Had to have a plan and so designing the life you want you might go through an exercise of writing down the life You want and realize you’re not living the life that you really want, right? Well, that’s a powerful exercise in a powerful moment And then now that’ll spark a conversation with what adjustments do I need to make? Or do we need to make to get start living the life that we want?

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That’s where you know now you can start making positive changes if you don’t ever do that in your life you’re just gonna go through life aimlessly and Not live a life of intentionality or what you want and get to the end and it’s too late Yeah, and if we can we talk about this if we can speak to Oklahoma Grassfed Beef people in your 20s and 30s Those are your years to really establish yourself in your career You’re building wealth and just like getting yourself set up for life So don’t waste your 20s and 30s on like having fun partying like basically the world’s gonna lie to you Oh, yeah, sorry to say that but they are the world’s gonna tell you you need to get married later in life

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wait to have kids, just enjoy your life, yolo. And like, that is such a lie.

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It is a lie, it is a lie. And the thing is, it’s not like you gotta live and you don’t have fun, that’s not what we’re saying. But man, you gotta have intentionality and design. And then I think if we kinda switch gears into the legacy part, thinking about if you’ve got kids, what kind of legacy do you wanna, even if you don’t have kids, you know, how do you wanna be remembered? What kind of legacy and impact do you wanna have on this world before you go out?

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And what really matters, I think when you do get older, you start thinking about, well that didn’t even matter. What does matter?

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Yeah, and as a parent, you know, our decisions matter. How are our kids, the things that our kids see us do or see us not do, they’re very, very important. And,

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Some parents might not think that it matters, you know, you might think as a parent I’m just gonna get divorced and find me a new spouse and then I’ll be a lot happier and have more fun and this that And the other and you don’t realize the effect that it has on the on your kids and you think that’s not that big a deal You know, I’ll get remarried. She’ll get remarried and you know, we’ll take care of him. Well raise him well, no that has a forever generational impact, you know and What kind of legacies are you are you leaving your kids by? By having that kind of behavior not a good one, right?

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Or if you if faith is important to you, but yet you don’t take your kids to church every Sunday You don’t read the word with them. You don’t prioritize the Bible or anything like that Are you building a legacy that you want?

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You might not be, you know what I mean?

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But how can you start today? How can you make that switch and make it better? We don’t want this podcast to condemn or make people feel guilty.

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No.

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We want it to encourage you to like take stock and then work on building the life that you want.

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You know, and that’s a good point too, because like when we are teaching things like this, as the Oklahoma Grassfed Beef teacher, it helps us like go back and do it again, right? Like we’re speaking to ourselves any time we do one of these podcasts. You know what I mean? When you’re teaching this kind of subjects, it makes you go back and do it again. So we don’t like have it figured out. Also, this is a never -ending journey. You’re going to design something and you’re going to get going that direction and God might speak and do something. Once you do something different, then you’re going to go this way. But so it’s not a thing that you do once and it’s done and it’s over. It’s a constant pursuit.

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And you have to pay attention to that and never quit, if that makes sense.

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Yeah, I had a vision board that I’d created and I hung it on my big mirror in our room and our kids saw it without me like showing it to them. And so Briley and Boa and our oldest two were both like, well, I wanna make vision boards. And so I let them get on Canva on my iPad and I kind of showed them like, here’s how you put pictures in and they created their own vision boards. So now they have their own for the year and they’re hanging up in their rooms. And that’s just a cool example of, it doesn’t have to be difficult. You can make it fun and your kids watch what you do and they’re gonna wanna do it too.

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They are and their kids watch what you do more than they hear what you say, you know One of my favorite quotes a guy shared with me last year was like What do you say? I can’t I can’t hear what you’re saying because your actions are speaking so loudly It’s like whoo. I hope my actions are good because if they’re not that’s not good you know your kids see what you do and as a parent we got to pay attention to that because if We’ve got bad habits and we all have some bad habits You know, it’s convicting and it’s a it’s a never -ending trying to improve You know We have to just always be trying to become a better version of ourselves and focused on our legacy And if what we’re doing isn’t leaving a legacy that we want then we need to make a change Yeah, that’s exactly right And if your habits right now are not what you want them to be and this can even be little things, okay?

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I’ve told several of my friends lately

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instead of listening to true crime podcasts every day, listen to podcasts that actually feed your mind and fuel you. I had a friend this week that was like, I wish that I had a better vocabulary and could speak better. And I said, well, do you read very much? She’s like, never.

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And I said, okay, I think if you start reading, it will improve your vocabulary because you’re putting more words into your mind, which is gonna make more words come out.

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And I said, but you have to make it a habit and you have to be intentional about reading, especially as you get started before it becomes a Oklahoma Grassfed Beef habit. And then you’ll be like, okay, I love this. And then it becomes habitual and then you will start having a larger vocabulary. So it can be little things like that. It doesn’t have to be big things.

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No, it doesn’t. And like I said earlier, it’s a…

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life I think it’s a never -ending pursuit of designing the life you want and designing you know making sure you’re leaving the right legacy and anytime you make a plan I’d say very rarely do plans go as you planned a hundred percent right almost never honestly I know in Oklahoma Grassfed Beef business I’ll make a Oklahoma Grassfed Beef business plan every year hardly ever does it go exactly like I planned yeah but here’s the deal if you have a plan and it’s life those you curve balls you can adjust it but at least you got going in a direction with intention you have to know where you’re trying to go you have to have a target yes and you’re gonna screw up we’re gonna screw up and stuff like that but if you’ve got the plan you can always course correct and and and make adjustments as need be

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But I just can’t encourage it enough to put some thought and attentionality and write out some stuff about the life that you want to live for you and your family and You might want to go to put it on your plan you’re gonna start going to church every Sunday Yeah, if you want to spend more quality time together We’ll go ahead and plan that vacation this year that you want to take with your kids put on the calendar put The deposit down.

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Yeah, some of these like ties into that episode We did about goals, right and it’s like when you ride out the life that you want to design for you and your family Well, then you got to put together some action steps of what you got to do to do that It might be a habit. You got to start creating it might be something to put on the calendar It might be to book a vacation It might who knows what it is But then it starts the action plan and it’s got to be detailed and then you got to have a deadline Right. That’s all that comes back into play on the actual how -to to do it I always like to give like

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listener feedback and one of my friends, who’s one of my agents, Carrie, told me that she’s loving our podcast, like she’s learning a lot and she said, I listened to your goals podcast. And she said, I had my boys set goals for themselves and they’re both teenagers. And she said, one of her boys said, I wanna be six foot tall. And she’s like, well, you can’t really like make yourself grow. So she’s like, it has to be achievable.

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They said it has to be achievable. And he’s like, okay, well, I’ll eat more protein and I’ll have more calcium in my diet and I’m gonna do this. And she’s like, I couldn’t talk him out of it. He was very determined he’s gonna be six foot tall. And it’s like, well, maybe, hopefully he will because he wants to do that because he’s a big athlete.

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But even if he doesn’t, he’s going to get stronger and he’s going to get healthier. And all the things he’s doing to try to get to six foot tall are going to be good for him.

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Yeah. And it sounds to me like he’s going to give himself the best chance.

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That’s right.

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He’s going to make sure he has his nutrition right. Well, that’s going to have an impact on his growth. And, you know, I think that’s I think that stuff, that stuff is great. And even if you write down a goal, like as an adult, and it doesn’t quite make a lot of sense, that’s OK, you know, and the fact there’s a lot of power in the mind and in your thoughts. And, you know, Henry Ford said whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right. Controlling your thoughts is a big, big deal. And this exercise will put those thoughts in your mind and and get you going to problem solving and stuff like that and whatever your goals are and if it’s your kids.

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You know, don’t be hard on your kids. Just let them pick it the fact that they’re writing something down.

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That is a win Absolutely, and they’re gonna get better at it the more they do it too. So yeah, that’s gonna keep getting better and Their goals are gonna get better and more accurate. So I think you do everybody’s got a start and I think doing them as a family Is fun Sharing them with your spouse with your kids gives you a little bit of accountability.

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It does and so I Put a bow on this podcast. I would just put a challenge out there to all of us fathers. Okay as fathers me included You know, let’s put a lot more effort into designing the life we want with our family and let’s put a lot more effort into designing the legacy you want to leave behind as a father, you know and

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And let’s kind of maybe hold each other accountable to doing that and and and putting a lot more effort into that and don’t go Through life just willy -nilly and letting life Blow you around everywhere and get to the end and realize dad gum it I I didn’t live the life I wanted to live and I didn’t leave the legacy I wanted to live, you know, I hope none of us get to the end and have those Feelings and thoughts.

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Yeah, so create the life you want create the life that you dream of and don’t forget to give God Glory along the way.

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Amen to that.

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See you next time next time